Immigrant Millennial
What's my identity?
The other day after the Pakistan vs Australia cricket series, one of the maintenance workers at my apartment complex asked me how did the match go, since I went to watch the game in person.
Very excitedly, I told him “We won- yaaaaay!!!”
He went “But, I have heard otherwise, Australia didn’t perform really well.”
“Oh! by we, I meant Pakistan”, I responded.
There it goes - an awkward silence afterward.
This conversation gave me a unique perspective that allowed me to see things differently. A constant thought replaying in my head is: What's my identity as a first-generation millennial immigrant?
The customs, traditions, food, language, and even the weather of the country I was born into are all that have shaped my personality till now. But it was me who always wanted to move overseas, because of the same traditions I was exhausted from holding on to. The scuttlebutt culture which I never wanted to be a part of, the climate crisis which was filling me with anxiety about my very existence, and above all the safety to wander without limits as a woman any time of night or day.
Starting from scratch after being successful in professional life, wasn't an easy decision, but it was worth sacrificing everything I assumed. Truth to be spoken, assimilating wasn't as difficult in the beginning as it is for many due to getting employment as soon as I landed, fewer language barriers - although an Aussie accent can make you doubt even the basics of your English language skills and above all due to being an independent woman whole my life.
But underneath I knew, a few things if not very similar were not somewhat right here too. Am I as safe as I assumed I would be? Am I still able to roam freely at night without keeping my guard up? Leave the night, the recent trauma of a young immigrant couple being attacked by an old Caucasian woman in Panera Bread over having an opinion on the Palestine conflict make me ponder- is free speech really free for immigrants? The continuous stares on public transport make me wonder if it’s my skin colour which is making people uncomfortable. Or am I the bad immigrant, snatching their jobs and housing? Never mind! At least I have better air quality for breathing and a fair pay rate – the most important thing.
It's mostly the same for first-generation immigrants who experience an identity shift after immigrating to a new place and of course, a lot has been written about it already. Mostly as humans, we identify ourselves based on religion, race, culture, ethnicity, and even language, however, to assimilate into the new culture the identity shift is usually laid upon community and common interests like employment choices, hobbies, and activities. But often this isn’t enough to integrate as the language barrier plays a crucial role that can lead to being disconnected from the broader social fabric, especially for first-generation millennials. The other day I was reading an article on ABC about dating apps and how discomforting people find women with a certain accent to speak to. This made me contemplate why the expectations and responsibility of acceptance lie on the people who are immigrating to make a better future in certain places, and why acceptability is not both ways- accept it or not, mostly we are good for their economy. Do you expect a white person to speak in a native Punjabi accent- nope it will not be possible, so why a multilingual brown woman must speak in a certain accent to feel accepted in society?
Though millennial immigrants are very smart in terms of adopting to the new trends but job market is another obstacle for them where no matter how sound their professional qualifications are- they always have to prove themselves extra by spending on useless diplomas that apparently add nothing towards their already built skills and further doubting their self-identity. Balancing the expectations of both worlds isn't easy as the feeling of "not belonging anywhere" can take an excessive toll on mental health and above all the looping uncertainty of extensive visa processing, where they spend years in the hope that the new place will offer them a fresh start.
Now can they complain about it? Nope! Not a chance. There are usually two options in that case:
“Go back to where you have come from”.
Or
How ya goin’ mate?
Can’t complain!
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As someone who is planning to become a firat generation immigrant, this one hit HOMMMEE! To be or not to be! Oh how I wish the world was just a more open, tolerant and more balanced place where we could all share in resources ---- Ahhh! But that's not the world that we inherited nor would it be the one others will!